Here is some reality check to keep in mind. And just be kind.
Originally published Medium.
Today, my second apartment application was refused. While I was given in two more applications and right now there is no potential place for me and my girls to live. I’m walking around with a few essentials, my computer and a book… taking my precautions with my mask on, because let’s not forget we are in the middle of a pandemic and trying to find a place to live is insane right now.
I’ve been living in a cockroach-infested apartment while in quarantine for the past 6 months. Working, homeschooling my girls, and looking for apartments (plus cleaning two times a day with the realization that soon it will be three times a day). That’s when I send my landlord videos and photos… Her answer says a lot. This is what white privilege, discrimination, and systemic racism truly looks like. This neighbourhood is in the high risks of infected people at the moment. Also, this an example of what Environmental racism in Montreal, Quebec looks like.
I’m a professional writer of books, I write for others, environmentalists soon collaboration with world leaders on sustainability, photographer and journalists. I help others in writing and education, and achieving the process of living more sustainably 💚✊🏾
However, the down part … being a woman of color, business owner and founder … innovation is not made for single women… and this is the reality I’m living while writing this in an Uber!
Yes! In the middle of a worldwide health pandemic, I’ve spent five days walking, taking buses and subways because I don’t have a car. Today, for under $10, I’ll treat myself to walking less after receiving my second apartment refusal.
I’ve been looking for apartments since we got out of quarantine… to finally be able to leave mine that is full of cockroaches. And FYI: my landlord knows what is going on, and all my tenants on top, next to mine and under mine, have been living in these unhealthy conditions because we’ve had no choice when COVID-19 and lockdown hit… and we’ve been paying rent for this too. While dealing with these unsanitary conditions, we’ve been working from home, cleaning, and trying to stay sane, while the world complains about not wearing a mask and the government is not helping. Landlords are the real fuckers and honestly, thank you for teaching me what I will not do the day I own my own dwellings 👏🏽
Another thing you asshole landlords:
It’s time to stop discriminating against women who own their own fort, land, whatever the fuck! We have just as much a right as any man to rent, own, and ask for a loan. Especially, when we have good credit! We are not less than because we are not attached to a second income. Or do we need to give you something else for you to respect us 😤
We have innovative ideas and some HAVE LITTLE CHILDREN THAT DEPEND ON US!!! Yes, single moms are outcasts and treated like shit because the “monogamy” system and hierarchy wasn’t designed for single women, parents, or business owners with children. 🤦🏽♀️ So I’m a founder women of color, I’ve been denied loans many times for my startup idea… but now I’m being denied places to live with my children. Not because of bad credit or debt, and I’ve got savings because hey, quarantine was brutal, I didn’t go out much, and I invested my money wisely. 🤷🏽♀️🤓
But now, I’m learning that when trying to get an apartment (if I had my two part-time jobs that I lost during COVID-19… they are closed until further notice) as a single mother and business owner… it’s not uncommon, especially for a woman of color to be refused. Therefore regardless of my circumstances, even if I had a million dollars saved in my bank account right now, the answer would be no, rejection, refusal of your application. So yeah black women, wealth is fucking essential because if not, welcome to living homeless.
Because living in an apartment infested with cockroaches is like living in the streets. Whether you understand or not, is it what it is, and I get this a lotttt: “A lot of people have it worse…” That’s the worst shit anyone can say to someone who does not have a home and is living in the streets, praying they don’t get hurt, or worse, raped.
So excuse me if I hurt your feelings and woke up a few neurons in your brain today. I’m in my 10th apartment, waiting, writing, and praying that this will be my home… where I can continue to be an awesome homeschool mom, content creator, author, and business owner and help people be financially independent too.
That’s it. Education, creativity, and mental wellbeing will be my legacy. But in the meantime, just letting you know, that right now, I’m officially homeless until God or the universe, lets the inspectors from the area I’m living in to call me 🤙🏽 so they can give me the steps to follow to cancel my lease so I don’t need to pay for this disgusting and unlivable apartment anymore.
I’m hoping that finally my landlord gets a slap on the ass from the government and they get sued for abandonment and neglect of their apartments… So I can leave my inspector number reference for my next apartment so I can finally get a place and not keep getting refused… because again, let me clear it up for you. I can rent a place for the next 4 months. I don’t want to buy a home yet… However, do you think I could get it?
I’m working on saving to buy my own place. My credit is good and I have my own business. Let me remind you, I’m a woman, Latina, dark-honey-loving skin and I’m a single mother. Don’t do alcohol or drugs. I’m a writer, environmental scientist, and own a company. So let me tell you, it doesn’t matter what you do or who you are. Keep your integrity, your honesty, and keep pushing.
Not everyone is like you, or is as giving or kind like you. _A.O
Not everyone can help you because we are all dealing with f***ed up stuff we don’t talk about or don’t want you around to see and discuss.
People don’t change, circumstances make them change. And let’s hope for the good, because when they change for the bad, people die or some crazy stuff they’ve been hiding comes out when you least expect it. Either way, I don’t want your pity or your “awww poor you! It will get better”…
I want change. I want people to give a shit more, to be better humans and work on their inner demons and stop pretending they’re something they’re not. Go volunteer your time and help someone in need. Go give a single parent a mental break and take care of their kids while they reboot.
I know what you’re thinking… that’s delusional and people don’t change. I know. Trust me, I’ve been living and hoping that people are different and I am always hopeful. I’m a big believer in change. That’s why WritersYep community is still strong and its growing at it’s own pace despite Covid-19. Because we focus on listening, learning, caring more about our remaining clients and finding ways to pivot, grow and help others along the way. We are a working progress, but so am I.
It is because of this pandemic, I’ve come to realize that change only happens for those with privilege, color preference, economic and political gain that is accessible and sustainable. Those systems are designed to benefit those who sacrifice money, integrity, honesty and are willing to sacrifice their loved ones for money… Yes, don’t pretend it is not your problem while you are angry and lashing out at people because you have to wear a piece of cloth over your face to protect people from your disgusting germs.
Oh, so you’re tired of your children being home while you’re working. Well your kids are risking their lives in the middle of a pandemic so you can go to work or stay at home “looking for jobs”. ✊🏾Yep, it’s brutal out there. But right now, children who live with abusers wish schools were open. Those are the kids we should be paying attention to, and the moms who are running away from their abusers and trying to keep their kids safe too…
Single moms and parents who want to progress and make it through alive in this era — you need to be wealthy and own your own network. You can’t depend on others. Because that will also be your downfall.
As much as they love you and care for you, people will help you until their own energy or their space feels compromised. So the only way that you can be your own free person, is to work on being financially independent and stable. Because if you don’t, then you are a burden to people when you are in need of help.
Yeah, privileged people don’t have to even think about what I wrote in this blog.
God and the universe are taking me through this road as a writer, creative spiritual seeker of truth and knowledge, and journalist because that’s what I am and always will be.
Whether this city, country, or planet approves or not, I’m going to continue to be me. Yep, now writing in the metro after seeing a beautiful apartment shown to me by a beautiful artist. Told her the truth and what I’ve been dealing with… it’s a sublease. So I’ll have to pay extra, but I don’t care at this point. I need a home for my girls and I. Hopefully, this is the one. Until next time, another note from the streets of Montreal, Quebec. Trying to find a place to live.
Stay home (It’s a privilege to have one), be safe, be kind to your planet 🌎, to you and others.
Love, A.O. 🦋
Written by Angie Abreu Olivo -Founder, Creative Entrepreneur and Environmentalist Single Mom. Edited by Vanessa.
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